Hamsta Crime Tales

"I'd like to makes some extra cash
making HAMSTER babies!!"

"HAMSTER Hatched"
(on special hamster hatching spoon, to prevent actual touching of hamster)


"HAMSTER
has been working out!"
(You GO Hamsta!)



"HAMSTER has attitude!"




"Oh No.
HAMSTA went BAD!"

McNumNut's Vice-Presidential Pick!!

Things you should know about Sarah Palin:

1. She is under investigation in Alaska for abuse of power.

2. She supports Big Oil.

3. She is opposed to reproductive rights for women.

4. She has no federal/international experience. Prior to her extensive experience as a Governor for TWO YEARS, she was Mayor of a small town, Wasilla, AK; a town of only 5,469.

5. She Is opposed to listing Polar Bears on the endangered species list.

6. She supports drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge.

7. She wears fur & supports the aerial shooting of bears.

8. She has a vagina.

Sarah Palin partying it up like a VIKING!!!

what a tool!

i hope she has a myspace page so I can go write some sh*t on there too!!

To all the annoying yoga mom's at Whole Foods:

Is your Kid Gifted? Probably Not...


http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/family/08/27/gifted.kids/index.html?imw=Y&iref=mpstoryemail


hahahaha!! I knew it! I knew my hamster was smarter than your kid!!!









Baby Hamster I conceived
with the help of
In vitro hamstilisation.

WHAT IS THIS MAN's FAVE SONG?

A. B-52's "LOVE SHACK"

B. Janet Jackson "LET'S WAIT A WHILE"

C. John Cougar MellenCamp "CHERRY BOMB"

D. Kajagoogoo "TOO SHY"

...If you see a faded sign by the side of the road that says
15 miles to the... Love Shack! Love Shack yeah

I got me a Chrysler, it seats about 20
So hurry up and bring your jukebox money

WRONG!!
Gawd!
STEREOTYPE MUCH?

"Let's Wait Awhile" by Janet Jackson.

There's something I want to tell you
There's something I think that you should know
It's not that I shouldn't really love you
Let's take it slow

When we get to know each other
and we're both feeling much stronger
Then let's try to talk it over
Let's wait awhile longer

Remember that special night?
When all of the stars were shining bright
We made our first endeavor to stay together
We made our very first promise

To love, to share and be real honest
But on that very first night
It wasn't quite right

Let's wait awhile before it's too late
Let's wait awhile, our love will be great
Let's wait awhile before we go too far

I didn't really know not to let all my feelings show
to save some for later so our love will be greater
You said you would always love me

Remember I said the same thing too
You don't have to be frightened with my love
Because I'll never give up on you

Let's wait awhile, before it's too late
You know, you can't rush love
Let's just take our time
Love's so good - sure I'll love will be there
Slow it down

I promise, I'll be worth the wait.

I HEART MULLETS!

MULLETS:

business in the front, party in the back!

WHY I DON'T HAVE PETS:

special "gifts" when you get home.
The sound of little feet crunching in the sand.
Cat butt in your face in the morning.
cat rice crispy treat boxes.

MY NEW BOYFRIEND!

• Has a job.
• Looks happy at job.
• Is working at job.
• Wears pants.
• Is mentally occupied by exciting career possiblities at job!